I don’t feel worthy today.
I don’t feel worthy to write this devotional or to carry out this ministry God has given me.
Because I disappointed God yesterday.
It was one of those days. I snapped and snarled at those I love; I made others around me acutely aware of their deficits; I worried; I fretted; I doubted God’s goodness; I selfishly put my own desires ahead of the needs of others; I nagged; I put worldly things above the things I could hear God calling me to do; I strove to be in control; I allowed myself to feel superior …
Well, you get the picture, for I’m sure I’m not the only one who has had days like this.
I’m also sure I’m not the only one out there who wants to please God in everything I do, and as a result, perhaps you can understand why I don’t feel worthy today…
And now God is calling me to write a devotional. How can I do that when I have been such a disappointment to Him? How can I put down words on how we should live, when in my own life, I am so far from that goal? Isn’t it presumptuous of me that anyone could learn from a sinner like me? Aren’t I being a bit pious? A bit hypocritical?
If you’ve ever felt this way, then you need the same gentle, heavenly “nudge“ that God just gave me. You also need to remember the following:
* No one is perfect: “For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard. “ (Rom. 3:23 NLT)
* God loves us in our imperfection: “But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. “ (Rom. 5:8 NLT)
* God does not condemn us: “For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but in order that the world might be saved through him. “ (John 3:17 NLT); “So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus. ” (Romans 8:1 NLT)
* If God does not condemn us, then why should we condemn ourselves? “Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one for God himself has given us right standing with himself. Who then will condemn us? ” (Romans 8:34 NLT)
Okay, I get it; but doesn’t this still disqualify me from ministry? At least at this moment in time?
I think the real question here is this: Can sinners still be used by God? To answer this, we need to take a look at just a few of the examples in the old testament:
* God gave a prophetic dream to the wicked king Nebuchadnezzar (See Daniel 2);
* God called a doubter, Gideon, to save a Israel (See Judges 6);
* God gave specific and important instructions and prophecies to Elijah, someone who was running away in fear (See 1 Kings 19);
* God included a prostitute, Rehab, in Jesus’ bloodline (See Joshua 2, Matt. 1:5);
* God used a coward, Jonah, to save a nation (See Jonah 1-4).
I could go on and on, but you get the idea. If God were to only use perfect people, people who never disappoint Him, He wouldn’t have anyone on this earth to choose from, would He?
Then there’s the Great Commission: “I have been given all authority in heaven and on earth. Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and the Son and the Holy Spirit. Teach these new disciples to obey all the commands I have given you. And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age. ” (Matt. 28:18b-20 NLT)
Notice there aren’t any qualifiers in this. Jesus doesn’t say this is for the perfect. He doesn’t say this is only for those who never disappoint Him. He simply says to “go“!
But how can I, feeling as unworthy as I do, truly do His will?
This is the catch, actually.
But it isn’t about what “I“ can do, is it? It’s about what “He“ can do through me! My job isn’t to be perfect, my job is to humbly submit myself to Him, confess my sins, surrender “my” will to Him, and then let Him use me.
And that is what I’ve attempted to do this morning.
What is God calling YOU to do?
Remember that any feelings of unworthiness are unfounded. These are simply ploys of the devil to keep us from doing His will! Truth says that you are God’s child (See John 1:12), redeemed (See Eph. 1:7), forgiven (See 1 John 1:9) and covered with Jesus’ righteousness (See Isaiah 61:10); and perhaps, most importantly, you am called (See Matt. 28:18-20). That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t worry about the times when we fall short of God’s desire for how I live my life, for we are told to, “…strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. “ (Heb. 12:1b NLT). It simply means that God is big enough to be able to use us to His glory, despite our faults!
Don’t let anything put you off track from running the race God has set before you. Instead, rely on the One who has promised to give us everything we need to do His will, for “…I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. “ (Phil. 4:13 NLT)
In His love,
Lynona Gordon Chaffart, Speech-Language Pathologist, mother of two, Author — “Aboard God’s Train — A Journey With God Through the Valley of Cancer”, Author and Moderator for The Nugget, a tri-weekly internet newsletter, and Scriptural Nuggets, a website devoted to Christian devotionals and inspirational poems, with Answers2Prayer Ministries. Follow Lyn on Twitter @lynchaffart.