“Yea, all of you be subject one to another, and be clothed with humility: for God resisteth the proud, and giveth grace to the humble.” (1 Peter 5:5)
When growing up, the elderly were to be respected no matter how bad, childish, or mean they behaved … also toward children. And when children are disrespected, even they know ‘respect stops where abuse starts’ (whether it be physical or emotional). Anything called ‘respect’, after that, is only adults refusing to protect their young while demanding that children become victims, taking it quietly; wherein children begin to build an inward dislike for those we had hoped they would love.
Sure, there is continued merit in respecting the elderly, when they are behaving respectably, and to talk sensibly to them, even when they are a bit unreasonable. But, when lashing out, further measures may be in order. And still, such measures can be done in a respectable way.
If you have ever seen the elderly throw temper tantrums, it is reasonable to hope to avoid them. If you have been threatened that your inheritance might be taken away, you might need to consider if you are emotionally abandoning your children to not speak up. Do you really ‘need’ the inheritance more than your children’s love, respect, and emotional well being? And, who knows? It may only be another threat.
But, either way, if you want your children to ‘know’ they can come to you for guidance and protection in more serious matters, trust begins where they are.
You might need to remind the elderly it is not acceptable behavior to talk to people that way and, when it involves children, if they can not contain themselves, you will be taking the children home (or take them home); their choice. They might scream absurdities wherein you can always respond that you are sorry they feel that way, but that you have an obligation to your children, too.
Other circumstances might be even more difficult. But, you can count on this: God knows how to take a respectable stand, without becoming or condoning bad behavior. And if you ask Him, He will guide your steps; every time.
God bless everyone who looks after, loves, and respects the elderly; whether for who they are or who they were. Just know that children are to be looked after, loved, respected … and protected, too.
“Lo, children are an heritage of the Lord: and the fruit of the womb is his reward.” (Psalm 127:3)
© 2007 by Joyce C. Lock